This will help if you feel suicidal.

Depression, Help for friends, family, and significant others, Help for sufferers, Posts, Uncategorized

Having been away on a volunteer trip for the last two weeks, I somehow managed to mess up my antidepressants. Oops. I’ve been in a bad way recently, and most of my blog is on hold for now. However, I thought it was urgent to post this, so here goes…

This is what you should do if you find yourself in a similar situation; feeling depressed or even suicidal.

1. SEEK HELP IMMEDIATELY.

Call a friend, a family member, or a helpline.

Having someone to talk to can help calm you down and rationalise what may potentially be an irrational bunch of thoughts. And besides, at least it gives you someone to rant to! Getting help can make a difference in what could potentially be a life- threatening situation.

I’ll add some useful helpline links at the bottom of this post for anyone who may need them, but a quick Google can do just as good.

2. Be mindful.

Practice breathing, focusing on your body, and acknowledging (and then dismissing) your thoughts. By spending a few minutes doing this, you can help yourself to relax and think more rationally. This is especially useful if you have no one there to help and have to rely on your self to calm down.

Another mindfulness trick I like is to count out loud three taps of my dominant thumb onto each finger of my dominant hand, starting at my pointer, working to my pinkie, and then going back along to my pointer again. Basically make a pinching motion three times with each finger and repeat until you feel calm. This helps you to focus on something physical, grounding you to the present.

3. Get to your safe space.

It is very important to find your safe space, somewhere where you can relax and feel comfortable. Often, this will be under your duvet, in the bathroom, or in another quiet place. However, if you are feeling suicidal, it is important that there is someone else available to you if you need help. I would advise that you have a ‘secondary’ safe space, at a friend’s house, for example, where you have the added benefit of another human for comfort and support.

When feeling severely depressed, this is a good method of reducing any external stimuli, which may otherwise impact any anxiety or bad thoughts that you may be experiencing.

4. Treat yo’self.

Eat your favourite food, read a book, listen to your favourite song, or watch a film. Whatever it is that helps you to feel better.

Personally, I like to hide under my bed covers (safe space) with a good book and loads of food (think: ice cream, chocolate, cheese, crisps), or I’ll run a bath and sit mindfully whilst it is filling. Locking myself in the bathroom with the noise of the tub filling gives me a chance to get away from the stress of the ‘outside world’.

Anyway, that’s all for today, but I’d like to round up by asking my usual request, let us know if you have something to share! And one last thing..

You are loved ♡

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International:

https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/

https://www.befrienders.org/need-to-talk

UK only:

https://www.samaritans.org/

https://www.mind.org.uk/

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What is ‘pacing’ and how can it help my fibro?

Help for sufferers, Posts, Work

Plenty of people with chronic illnesses like to talk about pacing, but if you’re newly diagnosed or have only recently started looking for advice, then you might not know what this is.

Pacing is a method of coping with the fatigue-like symptoms often associated with chronic conditions such as fibro. It involves creating a broken down or spread out routine, so that tasks can be separated into smaller, more manageable chunks. This ensures that you can concentrate longer on tasks by giving yourself small rest breaks in between.

For example, I like to split up my daily chores, study sessions, and various errands by having at least five to ten minutes of nothing for every hour or so. After a while, I have a larger break, and if I’m struggling, I will increase the frequency of my breaks. If you don’t like to sit and do nothing, try doing something easy that takes little energy (mental, physical, or otherwise) and is a distraction from your task.

(N.B: From here on it gets complicated, so you might want to skip the next paragraph if you dont fancy the heavy reading!)

The next question is this; how do you figure out your rest to work ratio? Well first of all, you need to spend some time figuring out how long you can go before you lose the will to live. This is how long you can go before you need a big break. Then, try and count how many times within this you get distracted; this is how many mini breaks you need. Spread them evenly within the time frame, and aim for between five and fifteen minutes for each break. you can alter this to your taste later, if necessary.

If all of this sounds too complicated, just remember to aim for 3:9:10 (for every 3 hours, have 9 equally spaced lots of 10 minute breaks, so every 20 minutes have a break). Or, have a 10 minute break every so often if you can’t keep count. Don’t forget as well that you can mix up the same ratio for smaller or larger amounts of time, and for every 3 hours, have at least half an hour or more to recuperate.

Most importantly, though, is to remember that you aren’t aiming to get loooaaaddss done, but to work at an efficient pace that keeps you healthy and happy. If you can’t do as much as you thought, that’s okay. Just stop for the day and adjust accordingly tomorrow.

If you like my pacing method or think you have something to input, please help us all out and let us know in the comments.

Thanks for reading!

Beat back the fog in five simple steps

fibro fog, Help for sufferers, Posts

Having fibromyalgia has many a downside, but one of the most irritating (and most overlooked) issues of the condition is fibro fog. From losing your glasses (check the top of your head) to forgetting an important appointment, the fog ruins us all at some point. Here are five simple steps to get the worst of it under control…

1. Establish a routine.

If you set a daily routine, it helps to keep track of those pesky things that love to disappear, such as your glasses and keys. I like to leave my keys in the same place each day so that I know that they will definitely be there when I need them. Likewise, checking for That Important Thing every time you do a certain task can help to set up a routine.

2. Set reminders on your phone.

I ALWAYS forget to take my meds, as in, I forget my meds every. single. day. To combat this, I have two reminders set on my phone, one at my usual wake up time, and one a few hours later, just in case. Honestly, it’s the best thing I’ve ever done, and it’s prevented countless numbers of flares.

3. Invest in a diary, journal, or planner.

Planners are useful for getting down those daily events that often slip your mind, and getting a little pocket diary means that you can take it everywhere for when you need it the most. Appointments, anniversaries, contacts, and to do lists can all be jotted down, and you can even take note of any important symptoms or fibro issues that you think are important. This way, you have an ‘external hard drive’ for your brain.

4. Load up on post it notes.

If there’s something you know you will forget, there’s nothing better than a huge glowing sign to remind you. Although not quite huge or glowing, an easy trick to help you to remember something is to leave your future self a post it. They have the added benefit of being colourful, sticky, and small enough to take with you, so you can use them anywhere and anytime. Write down a quick message and stick it where you’re sure to see it (mirrors, doors, the kettle, your fave snack).

5. Learn to ‘pace’.

Pacing is a technique often used by people with chronic illnesses which allows them to function for longer. Although it primarily helps with fatigue, it is also good for curbing mental exhaustion and cloudiness. Set out daily goals with steps towards each one, but make sure that they are small and achievable with breaks in between. Remember, set yourself a limit and do not exceed it. This way, you are less likely to spur on any foggy moments that would usually be caused by tiredness.

Have you got any of your own ideas? Let us know in the comments and don’t forget to like the post so I can see that I’m not just talking to myself *awkward laughter*.

Five things to do when you don’t know what to do with yourself.

Depression, Help for sufferers, Pain, Posts

Sometimes, being tired and in pain can make you feel a bit restless, and when it does, I sometimes find myself struggling to know what to do. It’s times like this when I really wished I had some advice, but, as it stands, I never actually got any. That’s why I’m writing this post today. Here are my five favourite things to do when I don’t know what to do with myself…

1. Build your ‘mind palace’.

As a kid, I was quite an introvert and, being an only child, I often had to find ways to amuse myself. This usually meant making up fictional lands inside my head and filling them with fictional people that had fictional stories. They often resembled the plots of my favourite novels, or the odd movie I had seen. It sounds silly, but escaping into my mind made me feel like I had control over my microcosm, and gave me a certain amount of relief from reality. Not much has changed. Although much more confident and outgoing, I still rely on my own inner sanctuary when I get stressed, bored, or in need of a distraction. You should try it sometime.

2. Eat some food.

You know the drill. You’ve been on a healthy eating craze for the last two weeks, and you’re doing so well, but now you’re miserable, you’ve got cravings, and you need a mega distraction from your current state. Take it from me, everyone needs a break now and then, and giving in to that tub of ice cream in the back of your freezer won’t do any harm as long as you start tomorrow afresh.

3. Talk to your ‘person’.

You can probably agree with me here that most people are lovely in small doses, but then they get a bit annoying. However, most of us tend to have at least one special person (or animal, as younger me would like to insist), and they are the ones who don’t wear you down. It’s pretty obvious that it’s these special people that we need to look after and keep hold of, but it’s also important to remember that they have a purpose in our lives too, and will probably be more than happy to help. When you’re feeling down, give them a shout, send them a text, or plan a night in. Having someone to talk to about how you feel will make you ten times less miserable. It’s like they say; “a problem shared is a problem halved.”

4. Surf the endless pages of the internet.

It’s very easy nowadays to drown under the endless amounts of information available at the click of a button, and nearly everyone can agree that it can get a little dangerous. However, having a vast sea of distractions at your fingertips is the perfect remedy to a case of restlessness. Next time you’re feeling meh, use the time to catch up on your social media, Google any weird questions you have, or dive into an endless array of buzzfeed quizzes. I can guarantee that you won’t he disappointed.

5. Have a Netflix binge.

Losing yourself in a box set, or, if you’re more traditional, a series of novels, is one of the best ways of escaping your current situation. By watching a film, video, or tv series, you don’t have to concentrate much on what’s at hand. This makes it a brilliant way to lose yourself without having to over-process your foggy mind.

These ideas are just a few of the things I do to avoid feeling restless, however there’s many more out there that I’m sure you will have tried. Feel free to comment if you have any suggestions, as I’d love to hear them, and they could help other readers the next time they are feeling naff.